Fear and guilt, I say again, are your only enemies. Love and awareness are your true friends. Yet do not confuse the one with the other, for one will kill you, while the other gives you life.
-Neale Donald Walsch
A positive self-image is the first step in separating yourself from others enough to trust in your own abilities. An independent self perception will empower you to blaze right past the discouragement and adversity that are the principal roadblocks to your personal and financial success.
Self Help in a Flawed Society. I think that the self help industry has done a terrific job at helping millions to build a positive self-image. But sometimes I find that too much of the self-help guidance starts by lecturing to us that it is our own fault that we aren’t confident people.
This is a symptom of a larger problem in society where personal weaknesses are viewed as self-imposed in order to divert our attention from society’s own fault with the matter.
Sometimes, people are harmed in life only because they have slipped through society’s cracks due to lack of taught empathy and harmful social institutions such as bigotry and chauvinism.
Canada has wisened up to this problem by developing a new "emotional literacy" elementary school program called "Roots of Empathy." This program addresses the problem of school bullying, which has been cited as a cause for a 30 fold increase in teen suicides in Canada and the tragic school shooting phenomenon in the U.S.
Roots of Empathy is the first study of its kind, meaning that an education in human empathy is something that has gone sorely lacking in our society for generations.
Working Against the Grain. It is up to each of us to work around the flawed lessons of the past and to heal by being as kind to ourselves as possible. Self-esteem must in all cases come from within and radiate outwards.
So how do we create a positive self-image in a world where validation of our worth is so scarce and in the midst of so many confusing messages?
Eliminate Self-Blame. I believe that the key to developing a positive self-image comes from a process of rooting out all of the self blame we have conditioned ourselves to apply to our lives.
Negative people are notorious for failing to finish what they start. As long as we see ourselves as substandard people, we deny ourselves the "fairy tale ending."
When we think of ourselves negatively, we can not have belief in our aspirations because we won’t believe that we deserve to have them turn out the way we expect.
When we self-blame, we also teach ourselves to see our dreams as delusions and ourselves as incapable of carving out an innovative and profitable niche in society.
When everyone is better than us in our own minds, everyone but us have the potential to come up with profitable ideas and goals. That way of thinking is in direct contradiction with a wealth creation mindframe.
Maximize Self Perception. The trick to self confidence is to always go to the highest perception of who you imagine yourself to be in the midst of life’s ambiguities.
We must always recognize that no one ever has all of the facts and circumstances behind any of life’s challenges. The difference between success and failure is how we see ourselves when we aren't certain how others do.
Call it treating yourself right, call it delusional thinking, call it whatever you have to -- but positive self talk must occur in these frequent times of uncertainty. No one can give you permission to do this. It is up to you.
Embrace Love Given Freely. Stop wondering why people in your life love you. As long as you are not the victim of relationship abuse, express gratitude for the people who are in your life supporting, respecting and caring about you. They are a gift from a higher power and a reflection of all of your best qualities, which you need to acknowledge now more than ever.
Any time you spend worrying over what self interest others have that keeps them in your life is time lost on nurturing yourself and growing into a self-loving person.
Read my article Bulletproofing Your Self Concept for an additional discussion of the role that self-love plays in wealth creation.
, express gratitude for the people who are in your life supporting, respecting and caring about you. They are a gift from a higher power and a reflection of all of your best qualities, which you need to acknowledge now more than ever.
Stumble It!
